August 2011 — Tami Nealy regularly does things that make her family and friends cringe with embarrassment.

Like having her household shred the trash before taking it out to the curb. Or dutifully signing her son up for Little League but then insisting on paying the registration fee to the coach in person, and in cash, because the school’s website is too under-funded to use a trusted authentication service to secure its online payments.

“I’ve accompanied waitresses back to the register to watch them run my credit card after a meal,” Tami admits. “I was at an Applebee’s, and everyone’s looking at me. The manager comes over to see if everything’s okay, and I say, ‘Everything’s fine. Kara’s a great server, but I’m concerned about identity theft and I like to keep my card in my possession at all times.’ And I watch her run it through the cash register, hand it back to me, and then I’m back to my table with my family.”

Such obstinacy can cause mortified kids to take refuge behind the dessert menus. “Yes, I feel uncomfortable doing it,” Nealy says. “But when I go to bed, I have no question in my head about what happened with my credit card. Because I watched what happened.”

On the plus side, Nealy can proudly say she’s never been scammed, or cheated by con artists, who today seem ready at every turn to separate us from our money. She’s also become an advisor to her mom, now in her early 60s and among the age group most often targeted by scammers.

“She wants to feel she has her independence and can do everything on her own. But that’s actually one of the reasons seniors are targeted. They’re less likely to consult with somebody else because they’re determined to handle things themselves.”

For Tami Nealy, such vigilance comes with the territory. Nealy works at LifeLock, the Tempe-based identity theft protection company. As corporate communications director of the fast-growing five-year-old firm, she sees instances of attempted scams every day — many of them in her own back yard.

According to the most recent report on identity theft and fraud from the Federal Trade Commission, Arizona now ranks second in the nation, just behind Florida, in reported identity theft complaints per capita, and is the fifth “most scammed state” overall.

It’s no accident that Arizona and Florida also rank highest in retiree population. AARP reports that although people over age 65 comprise only an eighth of the U.S. population, the group makes up a third of all scam victims. The foundation’s research suggests that scammers target this age group because they’re able to exploit three main vulnerabilities that come with the natural aging process: memory loss, loneliness and a more trusting nature.

But there’s a fourth factor at work, too, Nealy suggests — albeit a bit more subtle one: the desire not to look like a crabby old curmudgeon. Let’s face it: asking lots of questions, trailing waitresses and spouting conspiracy theories about online shopping are quick paths to getting branded as a stubborn old codger. But those same codes of conduct may also save you from getting scammed.

“We’re constantly handing over our credit cards and personal information to strangers, because as a society, that’s what we’ve become accustomed to,” says Nealy, explaining her reluctance to trust that “super-secret black leather folio” we’re presented at the end of every restaurant meal. “But you know what? There’s nothing wrong with telling people you’re concerned about getting scammed. These days, that’s just called being smart.”

The secret? Take control of your interactions with everyone who tries to take away some of your cash. If they’re coming to your door counting on some dull memory cells to take advantage of, hit ‘em with a collegiate’s notetaking skills — and use a uni-ball gel pen, experts say: the ink resists check-washing.

If your phone’s ringing because targeters think you’re lonely, put ‘em on hold to check with your son-in-law on any claims the solicitor makes about your jailed granddaughter needing a money wire.

And if they’re banking on you being a little more trusting than the younger homeowners on the block, it never hurts to greet them at the door with a good, long Larry David staredown.

Curb the Pressure

In almost every episode of the hit HBO sitcom Curb Your Enthusiasm, 64-year-old series star Larry David gets into a long, probing staring contest with an untrusted acquaintance or employs to the quizzical strains of Franco Micalizzi’s “The Puzzle,” sizing up whether his opponent is telling the truth about seemingly trivial matters — a neighbor stealing his morning newspaper, a waiter claiming not to have received a tip — all the while his wife and friends squirm in annoyance.

Irritations aside, the Larry David stare-down is a scam-busting superpower that most of us would do well to adopt, suggests Felicia Thompson, communications director for the Better Business Bureau of Central, Northern and Western Arizona.

“A lot of people feel pressured into entering into these bad deals, because the person’s either standing at the door asking you to ‘sign here’ or telling you on the phone you have to ‘act today,’” she says. As a general rule of thumb, Thompson advises grasping the reins of the conversation, and slowing it down.

First, be slow to provide information, she says. Often a scammer will count on you filling in the blanks, in order to extract more personal details out of you. That’s how the perennial “grandparents scam” operates: a caller will identify himself as “your favorite grandson,” counting on you to say, “Justin?” Once identified, “Justin” will ask you to wire that bailout money to Canada. Also, don’t be afraid to ask for time to mull over an offer, discuss it with family and to request a number to call back at your convenience. “Whenever somebody says ‘no’ to any of those reasonable requests, you can almost be sure it’s a scam.”

And lastly, realize one of the main reasons you’re being visited by a potential scammer is that they assume you have more time to get involved in their pitch. Show them you’re also in no particular hurry to act on anything they suggest.

“Because many older people are retired, they’re simply more likely to be home when somebody comes knocking on the door or calling on the phone,” Thompson says. “It’s not that they’re not sharp; they’re just more available.”

If free time is your vulnerability, make it your weapon, too: Take your sweet time to read the contract, think over the presentation and, just for good measure, lock eyes with the stranger for an uncomfortable stretch. If you’re staring down a con artist, chances are they’ll squirm.

Learn the Script

No matter the scam, most cons follow tried-and-true patterns of persuasion, and if you know what to listen for, you’ll be better able to foil them.

“Whether they’re contacting you by phone or email, they will always try to pose as a trusted source,” says Nealy. “They’ll say, for example, ‘This is Tami with Bank of America. We’ve had some issues with your account. We inadvertently took $1,000 out of your checking account and put it into your savings account. We’d like to remedy this. Can you confirm your checking account number and your social security number, and we’ll put the money back?’ Well, what they’ve tried to do here is create a level of trust, create a problem, and then offer a solution that involves you giving them information so that they can fix it. In reality, banks don’t call you to correct an error. If anything, they’ll send you a notice in the mail asking you to contact your branch.”

The Arizona Office of the Attorney General lists several other “red flag” phrases to watch for, particularly with regards to telemarketing scammers. If the caller says you must “decide immediately,” or that the offer is “only being made to a limited number of people,” they’re playing off the proven appeal of scarcity. Save it for someone else.

A recent national fraud victim study by the AARP Foundation also found that people over 50 were more easily persuaded than the general population by attractive offers, such as a free meal or hotel stay in return for signing a deal; an opportunity to enter their name in a drawing to win a prize; an opportunity to cut their mortgage or to receive a new technology item. The FTC calls these “phantom fixations” — a prize too good to pass up.

In general, be wary of anything that sounds too good to be true, warns AARP columnist Sid Kirchheimer, author of Scam-Proof Your Life. Even if the offer is legitimate, Kirchheimer says, those “free” cruises or hotel stays could require hidden fees and charges that may actually exceed the cost of booking a vacation the regular way, or require a second booking at an inflated price.

“Do that,” he writes, “and the nightmare of your dream vacation begins.”

Don’t Call Us, We’ll

Call You

Scammers have learned that smart targets demand callback numbers, so now they’ll frequently provide them: most leading directly back to their operation or to call centers in Bermuda or the Caribbean, and which rack up expensive long distance charges. (Kirchheimer specifically calls out the area codes 246, 441, 664, 758 and 876 as scam call center meccas.)

Instead of calling back the number they provide, show ’em you know how to Google, and get your own contact information to verify with the BBB. This step can be particularly important when dealing with businesses that exist only online.

“It’s real easy to create a website and slap on a company name, and they can be set up anywhere,” says Thompson. “You definitely want to look at the contact page or the ‘About Us’ page, and then check with the BBB to see who that company is and what they do.”

Don’t follow links that the person sends you via email, either. “If you’re shopping online, don’t click on any links in an email, don’t click on a pop-up ad. That could take you to a false website,” says Nealy. “It may look like Target’s website, but it may be spelled ‘Targit.’ It’s called website spoofing.”

Nealy advises typing in the URL yourself. “If it’s a good enough deal, it’ll probably be right on their home page. It’s not going to be hidden.” Also, when you get to that shopping cart page, make sure to look for that one telltale sign of authenticity in the address: “https.” That little “s” literally adds the secure channel to the Web’s insecure network, and remarkably remains the one fortress hackers are unable to compromise.

“Most major retailers pay for that security on their website,” Nealy says. “If you don’t see that little ‘s’, you’re not going to want to do any transactions on that page.”

Write Notes, Not Checks

We all begin losing a little memory beginning in our 30s; by our 60s, some of us may notice a decline in our reasoning and decision-making abilities. Scammers have no trouble remembering that fact, and will often take advantage of the older person’s imperfect recall. Claims like “we agreed on this price” or “you asked me to enroll you” will sometimes go unchallenged if the victim can’t clearly recall the exchange.

The defense? “Get everything in writing,” says Thompson. “Don’t just take people on their word.”

Watch what you write, too — especially if you’re writing checks. Kirchheimer orders checks with just his first initial, but signs them using his full name — he says that makes it harder for a thief to fake the signature. Frequently check your online bank statement, too, to see if anyone else is purchasing anything using your information. Don’t wait for bills to show up in the mail.

“The one bit of your information identity thieves will intentionally enter wrong is your address,” says Nealy. “Because they don’t want the bill to come to you in 30 days. They want it to take much longer for you to find out.”

Know Your Grandchildren

Thompson says the Better Business Bureau hears reports of one scam every summer: the long-lost grandson, calling from a jail cell in Mexico or Canada, asking grandma to wire him some bail money — with the added plea not to tell mom or dad.

“It happens every year,” she sighs. “It never fails!”

Last fall, the “grandparent scam” was reported three times in Cottonwood, the last occurrence bilking one 75-year-old man out of $5,600. This past February, Canadian police busted what they called a crime ring of seven men and women who had been running the scheme in 36 states, including Arizona. In July, the scam resurfaced in the Village of Oak Creek, nearly cheating a woman there out of $1,000.

The defense against this one is easy, Thompson says. “Ask the person a question that only a family member would know, like, ‘Where did we spend our summers in the ‘90s?’”

To that end, it helps to simply stay in closer touch with family — something Thompson says the grandchildren themselves can facilitate.

“I have grandparents that are living here, and I talk to them every day,” she says. “They’re pretty sharp.” If her grandparents were to ever get a real call from her in jail, she jokes, “Trust me — they’d already know all about it!”

Scam Watch

Scams trending now in Arizona

Rental rip-offs — Scammers break into foreclosed homes, switch the locks and then place ads on Craigslist offering the homes for rent. Recently, two Phoenix families discovered they’d been had when they both showed up at the same house with duplicate bogus rental contracts.

Monsoon repair scams — Fly-by-night contractors knock on doors in neighborhoods hit by monsoon damage, getting payments up front for repairs that never materialize. The Arizona Better Business Bureau recommends checking the contractor with the Registrar of Contractors (azroc.gov) and never paying cash in full before the work begins.

Not-so-charitable charities — “A lot of times after a natural disaster, like we’ve had recently with the wildfires, we’ll see charities that were created in not the best interest of the donor or the recipient,” says the Arizona BBB’s Felicia Thompson. “Seniors tend to be very generous when it comes to charities. But you want to make sure you’re donating to charities that are legitimate, and research those charities just as you would a commercial business. They can start with the BBB, and they can also go to that company’s website.”

Jury duty scam — You get a call from someone identifying themselves as from the city court, informing you that you didn’t show up for jury duty and there’s now a bench warrant out for your arrest. You say you never received a summons, and the scammer says they’ll clear up the error if you give them your name, address, date of birth and social security number. “After not hearing back from them, you call the court and find out it was a scam,” says LifeLock’s Tami Nealy. “But by then, you’ve already given out all this personal information because they created this level of fear.”

Credit card skimmers — Thieves install a tiny device on an ATM or gas station pay-pump that reads the magnetic strip on your debit or credit card while the legitimate card reader does the same. Tempe police recently noticed a suspect repeatedly visiting the same ATM to adjust and read the data on his planted device. “My rule of thumb is, I go to the same handful of ATMs and gas stations, and I know what the machines are supposed to look like,” says Nealy. “If I notice something that looks fishy, I’ll alert the station or bank attendant and pay them directly.”